I curse. Admittedly, I curse a lot. When I’m angry I curse even more. If there are seven dirty words you can’t say on television or radio, I often use ten of them. I’ve been known to string curses together into long eardrum-searing sentences of ire. Sometimes when I’m playing, it just comes out that way too.

I’ve been known to let a few “fucks” fly when in the middle of a scene. It usually won’t happen in  roleplay scenario unless the character I’m playing would speak that way. However, in real life, I tend to let loose especially when I’m entering my Toppy/Dominant headspace and getting into control or punishment mode.

A scene will be going along in a rather steady way when all of a sudden something I’ve told the bottom/sub to do or not to do will crop up. It’s times like that or when someone I’m spanking or otherwise administering pain to tries to escape when I’ll throw a curse into the mix. It’s usually something along the lines of, “What the fuck did I just tell you” or “Didn’t I just fucking tell you to stay still” or some such thing. It’s not contrived on my part because words like that come easily to my lips. I can’t totally blame my New York upbringing but I’m sure the “tough guy” persona that many wear has something to do with it. As a person who also doesn’t really believe in things being taboo, I don’t think of words as off-limit barring some that would serve no other purpose than being insulting. Saying “fuck” and calling someone “stupid”, for example, are definitely not the same thing.

I’m never really sure how this sudden cursing comes across. I often think that it might put a little fear in the other person because the word and the way it is spoken gives the proceedings an extra layer of seriousness. It punctuates the anger that I’m letting well up inside me to propel the scene forward. To date, no one has ever told me not to do it or that it bothered them enough to get them out of their headspace. I suppose if it bothered them that much then I would have to make a note that I might want to play with those people in a more structured sort of setting like within a schoolroom roleplay (or just not play with them at all).

I don’t expect everyone to like my style but it’s my style and exists within certain parameters. Restricting my speech when I’m just playing to play is not one of those parameters.


10 Responses to “Language”

  1. As my good friend Sinny would say, RAD, YOUR THE DOM!!!!!
    hugs loretta

  2. Pretty fucking good post Rad LOL. Seriously though, I am a Union Electrician, and spending 40 hours a week on a jobsite around a large group of reprobate construction workers has me understanding just what the fuck you are saying hehehe.


  3. I like your style, Rad.

  4. How does it come across? Scary. Bad scary? Depends on how you define bad. It was good bad scary for me 😛

    When I reached back for the umpteenth time on Saturday night and you just about screamed into my ear “Move your fucking hands.” I was definitely scared. But it was a part of the scene for me. In other words – it’s fine.

    You curse a lot, but I’ve never heard you curse when the situation was delicate or something. I sort of liked it Saturday night. It was scary and dominant, and rough. And I like rough. I liked the added edge to the scene. It went with the entire theme of the night and while yeah, it was scary and got my attention in the middle of it, it wasn’t a bad thing.

  5. anything that can add an element of the perhaps ‘unexpected’ is usually a welcome thing during “play”.Cursing usually connotes anger..and anger, for some of way hawt. Fucking hot.. you might even say. The last thing I ever want/need/expect is a “polite” Dom/Top.

  6. I think swearing is fine, as long as the top doesn’t swear like a sailor and then punish the bottom for swearing (Ahem, Nick!). The kind of scene you describe sounds awfully intriguing.

  7. I must concur – “hot” is an excellent way of describing it.

    @Indy – that would be ironic. I can’t say I’ve never been scolded for my language (ahem, by Rad himself even!!) but I can say it was at a time/place when it wasn’t really called for, or added to something else I was doing that wasn’t right. But yeah…if I scream “Fuck that hurt!” in the middle of a scene, and then got spanked for it….um…I’d be pretty fucking pissed!! 😛

  8. I’ve been a bit out of the loop recently — even more so than usual, considering I don’t live in NYC and since my father passed away in March, there is no longer a reason for me to come visit and make my way to the SSNY parties or Paddles OTK night.

    So, I was just catching up on your blog and read that your mother had passed away. Please accept my sincere condolences. It must be particularly hard after dealing with your brother’s loss. I do understand the conflict about going to parties and such while grieving, but that’s what I did, and it was therapeutic to get spanked and relieve some of my pent up stress. I think most of us spankos understand about that kind of thing.

    I’m so very sorry that between your work (which you’ve said sucks), and dealing with such personal losses (which definitely sucks) you have so much negativity on your plate. I wish you and Sandy all the best. Try to have as many moments away from the vanilla world as possible. My thoughts and atheistic prayers are with you…

  9. I LOVE that kind of play! Well, you know — when a certain someone says nasty things to me, it gets me hot.

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