On A Silver Platter

Turkey and such will be the fare on Thanksgiving along with a helping of football. I was musing about all the massive differences between scratching my kinky itch when I was a teenager and now. A cornucopia of riches exist at the moment but is that a good thing?

My kinkiness, especially my love for spanking, welled up rather dramatically when I was in my teens. Back then, the idea that I could actually participate in the activities that turned me on was a dream that I thought would never come true. My only outlet in those years (and a lot of the years after that) was pornography. I would get on the bus and then subway, trekking into Manhattan to visit the string of adult stores that populated 42nd Street between 6th and 8th Avenues. Of course this was when New York was a lot rougher and before a couple of corporatist mayors decided to transform everything in sight to make it safe for their wealthy pals and vanilla tourists making a side-trip from Branson, MO. I was fourteen or fifteen years old, trying to hide my face as I sneaked into this store or that, perusing the shelves and frequenting the booths where one could see short films (this was before video got cheaper) and, of course, the obligatory peep show. There were a couple of times when I paid to see a nude dancer and watched the look of surprise on her face when she saw that it was a kid on the other side of the glass.

In those days, it was always exciting to find a spanking magazine or two. Most of the ones that existed back then were, for lack of a better term, crap. No scenarios that made sense in the photo spreads. People spanking each other with ottomans and shovels. Models with looks on their faces that can only be described at contorted campiness. However, it wasn’t like I knew any better so anything was better than nothing. I would eventually get enough courage to take the magazines to the counter, pay for them with whatever money I had scraped together and rush out before I could be assaulted by some unseen assailant — and we all know they were lurking behind every dildo display. Before going home, I’d make sure I stopped at a comic book store and bought a few so I could put them in the same brown bag in case anyone got curious enough to take a gander. Superman on one side, Spider-man on the other and copies of Swat and Sting sandwiched between.

It was like I was on a secret mission back then. Deep behind enemy lines, holding onto the secret information that I had to get back to headquarters — so exciting, so James Bond. The mere seeking of it out was half the excitement considering that after I got it home and locked my bedroom door, it wasn’t long before the messiness began. Admittedly, one or two magazines contributed to quite a few sessions of messiness but each was fleeting and certain not as thrilling as the chase, the hunt and eventual capture of spanking porn.

Years later it was mail order and the excitement of waiting for a package to arrive, tearing it open in secret and waiting for the moment when my parents or roommates or whoever would leave for more than a few minutes so I could get down to business. Geez, why was masturbation such an ordeal in those days?

Flash forward to the present. Porn is everywhere and I mean everywhere. Stuff that I could not have dreamed of as a kid is now regularly produced by amateurs, pros and all the flavors in between. At the touch of a few keys on my computer, I can be viewing stuff that I would have had to go on secret missions as a teen to get my hands on. Hell, I could not have gotten my hands or eyes on the stuff I see now — porn certainly has ramped it up since I was a kid. The point I’m trying to make in my long-winded way is that even though I can get anything I want easily, it is a little too easy. The thrill of the hunt is gone. The thrill of dumping the contents of a brown paper bag on my bed are gone. It was the excitement of waiting, of searching. of reaching for the tissue box, ready for a masturbatory Christmas wrapped up in three other Christmases with a couple of pagan festivals thrown in. All that is no longer possible when it’s all handed to you by technology that’s so easy, a teen can not only see it, he can produce it. When I can see fist fucking, spanking and a cooking segment all in the same video, the thrill is gone.

I’m not a technophobe by any stretch. I’m sitting here right now waiting for The Singularity to transform me into a post-human marvel of flesh and tech. But the excitement that I felt when I was a teen can never be had again. I have my memories but damn, a click of a button is not as satisfying sometimes.

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6 Responses to “On A Silver Platter”

  1. I think one of the most tantalizing aspects about being into spanking is the secret, slightly taboo, ” illicit” nature of it. Its practically mainstream now. I happened upon the John Tesh radio show yesterday ( yes..entirely by accident) where he said the word ‘spanking’no less than 15 times. It was utterly out of the context of ” our thing” but….thank goodness the word itself still provides a naughty little thrill.

    • The taboo of it all, especially because of my family, made it all the more illicit as did the fact that I was quite underage going into those establishments. Very exciting.

  2. I can somewhat relate in a way, because when I was a teen, part of the excitement for me was finally getting my hands on a computer which were at the time, supposedly a gateway to *everything* – I googled and googled (probably using Yahoo or Amazon back then) and because I was fairly new to the internet, finding something spanking related.

    I recall downloading Limewire because that was “cool” and looking for spanking clips and whenever one was a spanking and not some bizarre porn video, I would watch it over and over and over, and then delete it so no one would know.

    It was a thrill. I don’t get that thrill very often now unless I find spanking related things in vanilla settings.

    • When I was in a vanilla relationship, I used to sneak my spanking related surfing to late hours when my ex was asleep. I could get up out of bed without her knowing it and spend a little while online.

  3. Rad, so enjoyed this post, and what popped into my head was : why don’t you and Sandy put together a video, make it a business, it would be quite profitable, you could market it on spanking tube, albeit fairly inexpensively, or maybe its free, i’m not that computer savy, anyway, you were great in your last film, and Sandy got rave reviews on her debut, so why not, it will get you out of your present job, which you seem to loathe, and put you right where your passion lives.
    Anyway just a thought, sorry we missed you guys at MSA sounds like the new venue is just what we’ve all been waiting for. Kudos to Jesse
    Hope to see you soon Loretta

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