What’s It Worth To Ya?

Apparently, not a lot. I’m not the first man to wonder why women can turn pro in the scene but men can’t.

Is it something as simple as the fact that men are often willing to pay for something that women are not? Is it that some men are more capable of satisfying their needs by way of a business transaction rather than on a personal or emotional level? Is it that more men than women are driven to fulfill their needs even if it requires spending money to do it? Is it that women are able to hold off on feeding their wants and desires if they can’t find the situation that’s right for them while men don’t care how it’s fed? Maybe it’s just that there are too many men undercutting each other by giving it all away for free.

I’ve always been curious about this because, let’s face it, I wouldn’t mind making a few ducats on the side doing something I’m good at and enjoy. However, all the anecdotes I’ve heard and advice I’ve been given tells me that I would have a hard time finding women willing to engage in spanking and disciplinary acts while paying for them. Yes, I’m sure there are women in careers or segments of society that could not scratch their itch in anything but a discreet way. I’m also sure there are women like the above who would pay to have this need met quietly and privately. However, these folks are probably not reading the Craigslist personals section on a regular basis. Unless they are and get something out of slumming it with the rest of us proles. I’m also sure that I probably could not take an ad out in the New Yorker or Vanity Fair pushing such a business because I probably couldn’t afford it.

It’s more of a thought experiment than anything else. I tend to think the truth lies more in the fact that there are so many men in the scene who are jonesing to do these things for free that opening a business like this would find few customers if any. It’s as if you opened up a pizza place and I opened one up right across the street. You charge a reasonable amount while I give it away for free because I can afford to make a pizzeria my hobby. There are three choices for you: match my price, go out of business or throw a firebomb through my window late at night. Tough choices.

Like I said, I’m just musing on something that popped into my head and am definitely not turning pro. Unless someone is willing to pay for it — then we’ll talk.

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17 Responses to “What’s It Worth To Ya?”

  1. Men probably can’t go pro in spanking for the same reason that most people in the Oldest Profession are female, or at least service men. Of course, now that you’re a famous movie star, it might be different…

  2. There’s actually a guy out in cali, he’s 21 and claims to be a “PROFESSIONAL DISCIPLINARIAN”. Says he’s been doing discipline FOR 7 YEARS or some silliness. The way he makes a buck is, girls come out to be spanked by him, and if they dont have to pay if he tapes the session. This session he then sells on a website. IF they wanna be discreet, it costs cold hard cash.

    I find the business model smirkworthy, but he seems to be enjoying himself. He also throws in perks like letting travelling clients stay with him. I dont frequent that spanking tube site myself, but Im told hes quite the big muckamuck on it.

    • Thanks to my ability of astrally projecting myself backwards and forwards in time, I have over 7000 years of experience as a Dominate.

    • I know him! Not personally, but in the online sense of the word….

      It’s something like $50 a session with him. One, it’s not really worth it to fly out to California for a spanking when I can get them for free in Pennsylvania….

      Two, I feel like it is a little indecent to have to pay to protect my privacy. I understand that he wants to make videos and get money off of them, but it feels a bit like coercion to me.

    • Sky, this guy’s a joke and a half. He makes me ashamed to share a generation with him. He is the epitome of why young people aren’t taken seriously in this community.

      Forcing girls to become adult video stars if they can’t afford to pay him? If they’re flying halfway across the country, what’s 50 more bucks?

      He really makes my blood boil!

  3. I’ve seen a few ads from male spankers looking to charge for their services. Of course, I could post an ad like that too… but it wouldn’t make me an *employed* pro. It’s interesting though, I know a few professional female spankers and they’ve all shared (in a general way) that while the majority of their customers are indeed men, they do get a decent number of couples as well as women.

    Asked a question about how open folks were to paying for a spanking over at American Spanking Society a while ago… and while the majority of women said they wouldn’t, there most certainly were those that said the would. The main reason seemed to be getting what they wanted (a spanking) without having to deal with anything sexual. They could be blunt… I want this, this and this and I don’t want that or that… and know a “professional” will never even ask further than that.

    Of course, being open to an idea and actually following through are two different things. At the end of the day, there are no shortage of spankers that are plenty happy to offer their services for free. Also wonder how many spankees would focus on the idea that “he doesn’t want to spank me, he’s not doing this because he cares, etc-etc… he’s only doing it for money.”

    Added all together, I’d guess a talented spanker that had it all going on… that was willing to spend time getting his name out there… could have a small amount of success as a professional spanker.

    ~Todd

    • This was really just a thought experiment rather than a whine about why this or that. I think you’re right that in the end, there are few women willing to pay and too many men who’ll do it for nothing.

  4. I tend to think that spanking doesn’t have professionals at all. It has, of course, people that are more experienced than others, and those who may act in a more “professional” manner than others, but at the end of the day, it’s not really a career path.

    Besides, what’s that saying?….”It’s not work if you’re doing what you love”

    Personally, if you like what you’re doing and you’ve got people willing to play with you, you’ve got it going on already…. 🙂

  5. I met an ex male pro (ex pro, not ex male) this weekend. He says he had 50 regular female customers. I don’t know him well so I don’t know details, but maybe it is not so impossible…

  6. I know at least one local person who had “clients” as a professional disciplinarian. He formed relationships and made it about the discipline (from what it sounds like) rather than just ‘booking clients’ – that’s probably key. Where-as a lot of men want to see a pro-domme for something NSA, discrete, etc. a lot of women, while they most likely would pay for discretion/non sexual advances, they probably want something consistent and reliable, that they know will be there because they’re paying for it. When you’re paying for a service you’re almost always getting a better one – that’s the point of paying, right? Not always, but it can be the case much of the time. But a woman who can’t seem to find something regular or consistent, might choose to pay for it.

    Oddly enough, yesterday we had a professional development class and talked about what makes someone professional and *A* professional. Someone can be a professional, but not behave in a professional manner and others can have a very professional manner and be considered an ‘amateur’

    I think the biggest thing we discussed was what truly defines professional and we came up with several characteristics, etc. One thing is this is in reference to Massage and how we differ from prostitutes but ideally: A professional is someone who is skilled and knowledgeable, enthusiastic about their practice, follows and ethical code, and stays within the scope of their practice. Having associations and consequences for breaking that ethical code.

    Not much of this applies to ‘sex workers’ which spanking models (who some I consider professionals, but most, people who do it for fun and love), pro-domme’s and in NV, prostitutes are – because there aren’t unions and national licensing associations for them – however, there is many an unwritten ethical within this field and if not followed, is certainly consequential and has repercussions.

  7. For several years, I frequented spanking clubs where men paid to spank women. This is, I believe, the standard practice. It’s either rare or non-existent that women would actually pay men to spank them. It’s just the different ways in which men and women are wired.

    However, in all my years of patronizing the spanking clubs, I never was “forced” to spank an ugly woman. I did pass on one woman who was not my type, but that’s free choice.

    So now I wonder: Would a woman who is less desirable than the club employees are, be willing to pay a man to spank her? It’s a reasonable question, because many times I would meet women who got older and therefore less, er, “desirable,” and still they craved the sensation of getting spanked. They would confide this to me. Maybe they were fishing, but I didn’t bite.

    I have names in mind, but of course I won’t post them here. I wonder how some of these formerly younger women would manage to get their spankings as age and, maybe, extra weight made them undesirable as professional bottoms.

    Cheers,
    Dan

  8. I nearly lost my spanking virginity to a CA male pro years back. I bought a ticked, sent in my fee for a weekend retreat. Then got cold feet, cancelled my check after seeing something kind of buried in this website. Along with the fact that this guy wanted me to pay for going out for dinner, and a tribune/tip, along with his fee.

    At the time…my brain figured, well if I was going to get spanked it should be by someone who knew what they were doing. Fortunately the red flags went off and I cancelled. And boy or boy did he get pissy. Sent my envelope back un opened with huge letters saying “undesireable sender”

    Well that showed me I guess. And as many of my male spanker friends have said “You should never have to pay for this”.

    • Like I said, it was a thought experiment on my part. I’ll probably be writing an article about “advice” in the future but I have to be in full snark mode for that.

  9. I think that although I can see the sense in paying for a spanking (for reasons of discretion and ease) it would change the feeling of a spanking so much as to make it worse than not being spanked.
    It would be like I was in control too much and also I would worry that he hated doing it, that he felt no joy or pleasure in his role. These feelings would make any spanking really … yucky.*

    *Yucky= instead of a heartfelt, long emotional paragraph about how horrid it would make me feel.

  10. I have to say honestly, I *would* pay someone to spank me.

    He would have to be very specific to my needs, and very ready, willing, and able to give me the kind of scene I wanted. I wouldn’t want to control it, but I’d want the scene to fall into the category (probably daddy/little girl) or something similar.

    If I knew I was going to be guaranteed a quality scene from that I’d walk away happy, fulfiled and wanting more, yeah I’d pay for it.

    Thankfully, I have a very select few whom I trust to let them spank me within a simple parameter and limits. There’s something to be said for that – saying what you want and then allowing the other person to put their own personal finishing touches on it, it’s what I enjoy most.

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