The Top’s Version Of Annoying Brattiness

Another brilliant observation by yours truly in Shadow Lane chat tonight. After much exhaustive research, I have found the elusive Toppy analogue to the over-the-top bratting. Follow me and be amazed.

I’m not going into it again but quickly, there is a big difference between friendly and annoying bratting. When it becomes intrusive and disruptive to a target or those around that person, it is too much. All this time I’ve wondered about what constitutes a similar annoying demeanor on the other side of the equation. What is it that a Top can do that might not be considered a horrible breach of etiquette yet still be cringe inducing to those directly involved as well as observers of said behavior. Simply put, it is the Top that Tops from the first second he meets a bottom.

I’m not talking about people who call themselves “Master” or “Sir” or “Knight of the Temple Mount” or whatever — I’m talking about your Top in the spanking scene. The Top in question often views themselves as a disciplinarian and might even have some sort of self-professed philosophy that his brand of discipline is helpful to all the women he Tops. I suppose it might be true but that’s up to the bottom to decide whether punishment is helpful or not. At its simplest, this sort of Top will meet a woman or just see her standing nearby and immediately make some sort of spanky comment about “proper uniforms” or “lateness” or whatever other contrived rubbish populates his brain. On occasion, the recipient of these comments might be bold enough to give him hell but I’ve often seen a sort of polite but awkward silence or brief acknowledgment of the remark as if trying to avoid an embarrassing situation. This is often all the Top is waiting for, that brief opening  of confusion to “sweet talk” the mark into a spanking scene. He’s being Toppy and she doesn’t want to make a scene so goes along with it to avoid causing a commotion.

This might seem like mere spanking flirtation on the surface but this is the reason I compare this kind of overly forward Topping  it to over-the-top bratting. With the latter, a Top is usually embarrassed into giving the brat the spanking she is seeking whether he wants to or not just to save face in front of people. He feels that if he does nothing, he will not be sufficiently Toppy or part of the game playing that goes on. Similarly, the spanking that ends up happening after the overly forward Top has steered his unsuspecting mark into a scene is not about two people having fun but about the Top getting what he wants at the expense of anyone he can get. It’s not important that the woman would not normally play with this particular Top, it’s that he’s spanking someone whether she is totally into it or not. It doesn’t matter to this kind of Top.

In both cases, with these hyper Tops and super brats, the behavior is an intrusion on someone else and those folks that are nearby. For lack of a better term, they are the same even though from opposite poles of the spanking kink.


11 Responses to “The Top’s Version Of Annoying Brattiness”

  1. hehe. What gets me are the people who have hare-brained philosophies, such as those who profess to be disciplinarians and honestly believe that they are improving the lives of the bottoms they punish, or visa versa. Excuse me, but you know what improves the lives of people? When people learn to behave like adults and take responsibility for their own actions! Bending someone over and spanking them like a naughty child doesn’t accomplish maturity or personal growth. Yeah, it might work as a motivational tool, it might be fun, and it might be highly erotic too, but let’s not kid ourselves about this whole making-better-people-through-spanking nonsense.

    • I’ve always bounced hard off of that sort of thinking. I can see it is as somewhat of a motivational tool that’s fun to boot but I agree that ultimately a person has to reach down inside themselves and just do what needs to get done.

      That said, I am not a bottom and certainly don’t have the kind of personality that would respond to something like that. I’m sure there are those out there that might say it does work. As always, YMMV.

      • How about those Femdoms who profess to be Female Supremacists and claim that men are inherantly inferior to women? I can’t tell if they actually believe that or not, but some of them write whole books on their philosophy of the female dominated society. Crazy!

  2. I think my thoughts may be along the same lines as yours, certainly in relation to bratting they are, that’s for sure.

    At a party one time, I witnessed one of the people I was with inadvertently make a tiny error. A top was inconvenienced for perhaps 15 seconds because of it, and it wasn’t done deliberately in the first place. That didn’t seem to matter though, in his eyes it was an opening and someone was getting spanked for it. It was the actions that made me uncomfortable, and I am sure it did the person who was the recipient of them as well. Her back was to the wall and the top put his hand on the wall and leaned in. All of her personal space was cut off and he was pretty much demanding that she be spanked for her mistake.

    Thankfully she was strong enough to tell him no, because I can assure you, it was much nicer to hear it from her than it would have been to hear it from me 😉

    • I think it’s good to create an air that tells any participant, but primarily bottoms/subs, that they have backup if they need it to fend off unwanted advances.

  3. Smiling Devil, radagast, Richard Windsor: Has anyone told you lately how *sexy* it is when men communicate really, really well? Whew…a Top with a gi-normous brain and a flexible, open mind…now, that’s hot. Much, much hotter than a steamroller. I’m just saying…

  4. OMG. I’m NOT going to be a witness to this. RED!

  5. I’m with Sandy!!




  6. It must be in the genes. Can I point out that a well known gay site once linked to me and referred to me as a “Hetero Spank Monster”, it was in an affectionate way as well 🙂

  7. Great posts everyone. I find it sad when a top can’t relate to a bottom as a person first and playmate second. Be it male or female. And for a bottom to use bratting as first line of communication. It is painful to watch.

    Before and after a scene, I intend for there to be absolute equality between the top and myself. During the scene is another matter entirely.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: