Further Thoughts On The Subject

I want to somewhat encapsulize my thinking regarding the topic of what a person should or should not expect when attending a public spanking event.

Whether you are a Top or bottom, whether you are an exhibitionist (as I call myself) or not, the activity you engage in should stand on its own. What I mean is, just because you do a particular thing at a particular time it doesn’t mean that is indicative of anything other than your choice at that moment.

The discussion the other day revolved around what a woman should expect when nudity is involved and whether a person attempting to see more than is being offered up for view is acceptable behavior. For me it comes down to the intention of the viewer and the person being viewed. If during a spanking, a woman exposes more than she thought she would then so be it – it happens. But if a viewer is going out of his way to make sure he sees as much as possible then I think it’s an invasion of privacy.

The argument of “what does she expect” does not hold water with me – no more than it would if a man thought it his right to play with a particular woman because she appears to play a lot with multiple partners. That choice on her part does not make her community property nor does her nudity make her an anatomy subject. Honestly, I could say the same thing about Tops in public situations. Because a Top plays with more than one person, it would be silly to think that he’s willing or able to play with anyone who wants to be spanked. It just doesn’t work that way.

Feel free to discuss but, again, let’s not make it personal.


9 Responses to “Further Thoughts On The Subject”

  1. ThisGuy45 Says:

    It seems to me that the impolite lurkers and peepers are doing whatever they can get away with, in the absence of a POSTED set of rules and some person of authority to remind them of the rules.

    So how do you propose changing the behavior of these people, who may very well be strangers?

    What’s wrong with a cordoned-off area? If the women requested this, I’m sure that the event organizers would accommodate them.

  2. I have no problem with cordoned off areas. There are two specific ones at Paddles that I’ve used in the past but they are popular and it’s first come, first served. I can’t change the behavior of people who like doing this other than to thwart them by not letting them see what they want or ending the scene and moving to another location. Perhaps being shamed would help but I doubt it.

  3. ThisGuy45 Says:

    Is there room for a third? Is there a way to cordon off a temporary space on sparse nights?

    Are you stuck with lurkers and peekers?

  4. Certainly the idea of having more cordoned off areas can be brought up with the owner.

  5. ThisGuy45 Says:

    So who’s going to make the request that will benefit all?

  6. I’ll mention it to him the next time I see him or at the very least ask the question on their Yahoo board.

  7. While not in NY or at the club in question, the lurker thing seems to be prevalant at all spanking events I have attended.

    The “what does she expect” line of reasoning reminds me of the guys who assume that if a woman is willing to go to a public spanking party, she also is offering sex. Um, no. I’ve run into those more than once, and had it said to me directly.

    There is a distinct difference between watching a scene from a respectful distance and angling yourself for the “best” view. The vast majority are fully cognizant of what is polite and respectful and don’t cross those lines. The peep show contingent seems to have no internal compass when it comes to acceptable behavior in a social setting, and all the talking to, explaining, and showing in the world does not seem to help.

    Unfortunately, when spanking gatherings are for profit, as long as the gawkers pay their fee at the door, their money is as welcome as anyone else’s.

  8. Unfortunately, they’re always going to be a part of a party. Some parties more than others. Its why many women won’t allow their thongs pulled down in a public spanking. You won’t be able to change it.

    Funny thing is, the guys who maneuver the most to get a quick glimpse of pink rarely get to do more than that. Many of them could be spanking the same women if they just struck up a conversation and asked about giving a spanking. But, they don’t. I suspect for lack of social skills, but for whatever reason, they simply don’t go further than looking as closely as they can and going back to their room with the picture in their head, probably to jack off.

    k once had a guy bump into her in a mall, while she had on a short skirt, and took a picture under her skit with a digital camera. Poor slob. If he had chatted with her she might have bent over and flipped up her skirt for a good pic. His loss. He already got more than he deserved.

  9. M: Upskirt freaks give me the creeps more than spanko lurkers.

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