Pushing Limits

There are times when I play with someone who wants to be pushed to the edge of their limits and a little bit beyond them. Yeah, I like this, too.

One of the things that “clicked” between Sandy and me was the fact that there are times when she wants to play harder and have her limits pushed and it’s a style of play that I enjoy along with all the other things I enjoy doing. Now, Sandy doesn’t always want this sort of thing and I can’t always get into the proper frame of mind to deliver that kind of punishment but when we’re both in the mood, it’s often quite good.

I don’t know whether it’s the adrenalin or something else but there is a definite head rush that I get when in the middle of a hard scene like that usually around the time when I’m using a leather strap or a paddle (sometimes flogger). The reactions and exclamations really get to me – the body bucking and writhing, the yelps, moans or screams, the look on the face as you can tell they’ve entered some “other” place. There’s also something amazing about the fact that someone is putting this much trust in me to bring them to a certain point – an incredible and exhilarating responsibility.

Now, playing like this is not something that comes easy or is possible with just anyone and it goes to the realm of two people being in complete sync with each other. The Top has to be willing to tap into their sadistic side and the bottom into their masochistic one. Other than with Sandy, there are only a couple of other people I’ve gone that hard with and only after I was utterly sure that is what they wanted.

A hard scene makes for a wonderful change of pace from any sort of role play because rather than have to “act”, I am merely doing.


9 Responses to “Pushing Limits”

  1. Just reading about it makes one shiver…

  2. radagast Says:

    Writing it gave me a bit of a rush as well.

  3. So, do you (Sandy/Rad, Dolly/Jon) plan for hard sessions with your respective partners? Or do they morph from regular play?

  4. radagast Says:

    For the most part, Sandy and I don’t plan on it but she might ask for it on occasion. Most of the time it just happens when we’re feeding off of each other during a play session.

  5. funny brat girl Says:

    I definitely enjoy when the hard play goes there on it’s own…when the energy takes over both parties involved…a sudden rush, its awesome!

    Sometimes I find when it’s planned or discussed prior to the play happening…a different outcome happens. Mostly because I’ve thought about it too much or blatantly blocked the energy flow by allowing other emotions to get involved…if that makes any sense.


  6. radagast Says:

    I think that people can overthink any situation and have such a set idea of what’s going to transpire that the reality can never match what’s in their head. I think as long as a person has it in them to go to a certain place and do a certain thing, it’s entirely likely that two people can get there organically.

  7. Good question, Laura.

    I’d say we just play the way we play. Sometimes it goes harder and because of my headspace it does not seem hard. I’d say a couple times we’ve planned for more, and sometimes it works out.

    I think it can be hard for a spouse to go harder because, in the end, it is your spouse! We have friends who like to play hard, but he can’t go that far with her because they are in a relationship and in the end, he fears going from hurt to harm (even though he is best suited to know the difference).

    I tend to get harder play, I think, from others, but there are times I want it from Jon but can’t really say so (though he read along with me as I wrote and we talked about it, so I guess that flogger is out of the bag!).

  8. I think it is hard to plan. I have learned the hard way with some Tops that when I have said that I like to play hard…they take it as a challenge. Playing hard or being pushed to and beyond my limits has to do with both my physical limits and the psychological part of the scene.

  9. radagast Says:

    Pushing limits is mentally tiring for a Top especially if he or she wants to do it the right way for the person they are playing with and not “just because”. I can’t Top people mechanically and can’t play hard as a mere physical thing. I have to feel it too or it’s not going to work.

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